The narrator and his son go to the haunted house, but there is no one there to greet them. The narrator can't buy the tickets because the internet is so bad, but he's already bought two adult and one child tickets. He's worried that his son will have nightmares after the experience, so he decides to go by himself first. He tells his son that he'll show him what happens when a person is "mean to splatter" . The two go to watch a pirate ship, and the narrator blames his son for pulling him onto a roller coaster. He says that he willingly joined them, so this time, he won't force his son to do something he doesn't want him to do. He also tells the boy that he is afraid of ghosts, and that he will have a nightmare that night because of going into the "haunted house" with him.