Okay, Shmoop, now we're back to the narrator, who's in a daze. He's been reading yaoi with his body, and he's starting to get some fan letters for his work. He doesn't really know how to write about sex, but he figures he'll figure out a way to do it. The narrator is all, "Gee, I've learned about the sexy side of things, and I'm going to start writing about it now" . He figures he can just draw a picture of himself and akiyoshi kissing, and that's all he needs to do. The only problem, he says, is that there's no way he could ever fall in love with someone like that, because they're not like him. He can't believe that he'd ever fall for someone who didn't love him like that . And then he figures out that they've been having sex all this time, and it's not like they were just having sex for the sake of having sex. He starts to feel a little weird about it, but then he realizes that he has no idea how to stop thinking about it.