The narrator tells us that the grocery store is getting ready to close for the season. He says that there are a lot of special customers for Christmas this year, and there are 200 people who want to confess to their crush. He tells the inspector that he's going to try to find the guy he wants to talk to first, but the inspector won't let him do it. The narrator says that the guy is already waiting for him to contact him, and that he can't think of a better way to find him than by stealing him. The inspector says that he doesn't want to join in on the fun, and the narrator tells him that everyone can do what they please. He adds that he wasn't invited to the party, and he'll never lose this competition. He also says that today, he brought a special product for the audience: a "hammering-until-you-Kneel" device that will catch cheaters. The woman who's supposed to participate in the show is not supposed to be a cheater, but instead, the narrator says, she's the type of person who would participate in a show like this. He's worried that she'll be nervous, but he says that's not the case. He goes on to say that the narrator is worried because he already considered himself to be the woman's crush, but now he feels even more guilty. He decides to go out for a while, and then he