The narrator tells us that he's been in Touchstone's good graces, even though his wife is having an affair in front of Touchstone. The narrator says that he hates Touchstone, but he can't stand the sight of his wife being raped. He says that Touchstone is trying to crump smack him, but it's impossible. Touchstone gives him a present, a card, and a free extended ticket, and the narrator says he'll never come back. He's happy that he got to see him, he says, because Touchstone was always a nice guy. He also says that today was the day of the "avocado cream puff" , and Touchstone didn't