This is a locked chapterIssue #1, Tooth & Mail - Part 1: Space Bastards
About This Chapter
In this chapter, we learn that the company is going to "fucking die" by the end of the year, eleven months earlier than previously planned. The narrator tells us that this is because someone "hit us" with a message. The message is that the government is trying to regain control of the U.S., and that there's a lot of unrest on the other side of the world as well. We're not sure what the message is about, but we're guessing it's about the government trying to get back at the United States for all the stuff they've stolen from it. We also learn that they're offering a bonus of 30,000 credits to anyone who can deliver a package to any place in the universe within a week. That's right, the narrator says, the job is pretty simple. The job is to deliver packages to places where they have to go. The only problem is that every time a package changes hands, it means that the customer has to pay a fee. That means "ka - ching," or "traps" , or "laser trip mines" . If the narrator tells you to hold on to the delivery bracelet, he'll tell you to "hold on to your" dick. He's got a job for you, and he's going to do it faster than anyone else. He says that the only way he can do it is to "make some mother fuckers lose" : "I'm going to make some mother-fuckers." The narrator says that he has a big contract with the government that's not going to be fulfilled until the next morning. He doesn't know what the contract is for, but he knows that it involves four eggs.
This is a locked chapterIssue #1, Tooth & Mail - Part 1: Space Bastards
About This Chapter
In this chapter, we learn that the company is going to "fucking die" by the end of the year, eleven months earlier than previously planned. The narrator tells us that this is because someone "hit us" with a message. The message is that the government is trying to regain control of the U.S., and that there's a lot of unrest on the other side of the world as well. We're not sure what the message is about, but we're guessing it's about the government trying to get back at the United States for all the stuff they've stolen from it. We also learn that they're offering a bonus of 30,000 credits to anyone who can deliver a package to any place in the universe within a week. That's right, the narrator says, the job is pretty simple. The job is to deliver packages to places where they have to go. The only problem is that every time a package changes hands, it means that the customer has to pay a fee. That means "ka - ching," or "traps" , or "laser trip mines" . If the narrator tells you to hold on to the delivery bracelet, he'll tell you to "hold on to your" dick. He's got a job for you, and he's going to do it faster than anyone else. He says that the only way he can do it is to "make some mother fuckers lose" : "I'm going to make some mother-fuckers." The narrator says that he has a big contract with the government that's not going to be fulfilled until the next morning. He doesn't know what the contract is for, but he knows that it involves four eggs.